This ship is making its way through the water just fine on its own, thank you. I haven’t really been making a whole lot of choices these days beyond what to have for dinner or what color to paint my kitchen. No big ticket items. No real direction. I gave in. I am letting the current take me where it will. I just hope it knows where it’s going. All that talk about life being about the journey rather than the destination may have finally gotten to me. So here I am. This is me on the journey. Now what?
I have been making small strides and achieving goals. Accomplishments are my new thing, however small. I went back to where it all went awry and rather than forcing the issue or bullying the out the desired result, I am letting things take shape on their own. I have been temporarily taken over by one of the body-snatchers. And I have to say, I needed the break. But this comes with consequences as most idyllic notions do. This isn’t actually life. Autopilot does not equal reality. Though recharging oneself is necessary before moving into the next phase of life, sometimes you have got to put a clock on it.
In the mean time, while this Alien is navigating, I am reconciling what I actually want my life to look like and making a mental list of practical goals. I find that this can be productive and rather creative. I always want to combine two things that don’t go together. Nothing seems to fit, and yet, it all does. And while I am on this steady course to no place special I am cleaning house – figuratively of course. This seems like as good of a time as any to jettison that which does not apply to the future. That great unknown place where dreams go to either come true or die. Or, if you are a terminal optimist like me, go to get revised. Revision is my new mantra. Adjust, Modify, Amend. CHANGE. They don’t need to be biggies either. It is so true that the little things make all the difference.
Suffice to say, I am utterly content at the moment. You can see it in my expression and in the way I move about. There are great things happening behind the scenes. I am enjoying this time in the open sea because I know that there is hard work ahead, a bit of quiet before the proverbial storm. Eventually I will need to step to the helm and set a course, however right or wrong it may be.
I have been making small strides and achieving goals. Accomplishments are my new thing, however small. I went back to where it all went awry and rather than forcing the issue or bullying the out the desired result, I am letting things take shape on their own. I have been temporarily taken over by one of the body-snatchers. And I have to say, I needed the break. But this comes with consequences as most idyllic notions do. This isn’t actually life. Autopilot does not equal reality. Though recharging oneself is necessary before moving into the next phase of life, sometimes you have got to put a clock on it.
In the mean time, while this Alien is navigating, I am reconciling what I actually want my life to look like and making a mental list of practical goals. I find that this can be productive and rather creative. I always want to combine two things that don’t go together. Nothing seems to fit, and yet, it all does. And while I am on this steady course to no place special I am cleaning house – figuratively of course. This seems like as good of a time as any to jettison that which does not apply to the future. That great unknown place where dreams go to either come true or die. Or, if you are a terminal optimist like me, go to get revised. Revision is my new mantra. Adjust, Modify, Amend. CHANGE. They don’t need to be biggies either. It is so true that the little things make all the difference.
Suffice to say, I am utterly content at the moment. You can see it in my expression and in the way I move about. There are great things happening behind the scenes. I am enjoying this time in the open sea because I know that there is hard work ahead, a bit of quiet before the proverbial storm. Eventually I will need to step to the helm and set a course, however right or wrong it may be.
